## ‘Real Wave Conjugations’?! TV Actor Gives Most Bizarre Interview Ever On Red Carpet

Actor Terrence Howard of “Empire” fame (the same show hate-crime hoaxer Jussie Smollett stars in), says he’s done with acting, quitting “for good.”

And he’s miffed big time.

He appeared Sunday on the red carpet before the 71st Emmy awards and was asked about his decision. “I spent 37 years pretending to be people so that people can pretend to watch and enjoy what I’m doing when I’ve made some discoveries in my own personal life with the science that, you know,  Pythagoras was searching for.”

Wait, what? Pythagoras? The Greek mathematician from 500 BC famous for his theorem that states that the area of the square whose side is the hypotenuse is equal to the sum of the areas of the squares on the other two sides of a right triangle? That guy?

But wait. Howard was just getting going.

“I was able to open up the flower of life properly and find the real wave conjugations that we’ve been looking for 10,000 years. Why would I continue, you know, walking on water for tips when I’ve got an entire generation to teach a whole new world?” he said.

The interviewer was momentarily speechless. “That’s a big remark. what do you intend to do?” he asked after he recovered.

“Well, let me put it this way,” Howard said. “All energy in the universe is expressed in motion, all motion is expressed in waves, all waves are curves — so where do the straight lines come from to make the Platonic solids? There are no straight lines. So when I took the flower of life and opened it properly, I found whole new wave conjugations that expose the in between spaces. It’s the thing that holds us all together.”

Got it?

We admit we had to look up “platonic solids.” They are one of five regular solids (a tetrahedron, cube, octahedron, dodecahedron, or icosahedron). They are a regular, convex polyhedron that are “constructed by congruent (identical in shape and size), regular (all angles equal and all sides equal), polygonal faces with the same number of faces meeting at each vertex,” Wikipedia says.

And yeah, they are made up of straight lines, which Howard says don’t exist.

Again, the stunned interviewer had to continue. “And you’re going to be sharing that?”

“I’m going to be sharing that on Tuesday when I receive my star,” Howard said. “I’m going to be able to prove that gravity is only an effect and not a force. I’m putting something on YouTube where I will build the planet Saturn without gravity and build the Milky Way galaxy without gravity.”

No gravity? This we gotta’ see.

Howard was also asked about his star on the Walk of Fame, and he was not happy. “It’s interesting. How am I getting a star for TV when I’ve never received an Emmy nomination for TV? You know, I think an Emmy nomination would come first,” he said.

Well, for the record, anyone who is evenly marginally famous can get a star — if they pay. In 2017, the fee was \$40,000.

So at least that part is explainable — and it’s a straight line: Pay cash, get star.

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