Good News: DHS Hard at Work to Prevent… Terrorist Attacks… Zombie Apocalypse

Guest Post by Mara Zebest

Here’s one less worry… what a relief that Obama’s DHS is spending our hard-earned taxpayer money to prevent a zombie apocalypse. I almost wouldn’t mind if this meant they would rid this nation of the obot zombies.  Apparently, it’s another excuse to transfer wealth with no worthwhile results.  None of these Liberal bureaucrats live in REALville.  Step away from the remote control… we’re borrowing money from China for this nonsense.

As Hotair notes:

We’ve spent $35 billion since 2003 on DHS grants, and we’re just now closing the gap on zombie-apocalypse preparation? I’ll bet that China is way ahead of us in this area.

Other silly grants are noted in the article from the DailyCaller, which reports the following:

Most believe zombies are relegated to the movies and video games, but Oklahoma Republican Sen. Tom Coburn has highlighted the Department of Homeland Security’s participation in a staged “zombie apocalypse.”

According to Coburn’s most recent oversight report “Safety at Any Price: Assessing the Impact of Homeland Security Spending in U.S. Cities,” first responders were approved grant funds for a $1,000 entry fee to a week-long HALO Counter-Terrorism Summit in San Diego where the “marquee” event was a demonstration of a “zombie apocalypse.”

“[Strategic Operations] performed two shows on Halloween, which featured 40 actors dressed as zombies getting gunned down by a military tactical unit. Conference attendees were invited to watch the shows as part of their education in emergency response training. [HALO president Brad] Barker explained that, ‘the idea is to challenge authorities as they respond to extreme medical situations where people become crazed and violent, creating widespread fear and disorder,’” the report reads.

Coburn was not pleased by the event or much of the waste detailed in his report.

“For instance, paying for first responders to attend a HALO Counterterrorism Summit at a California island spa resort featuring a simulated zombie apocalypse does little to discourage potential terrorists. I hope this report encourages DHS to award funds based on calculated risk, not politics,” Coburn said upon the report’s release. “Congress has a duty to ensure that this grant program does not become a parochial, pork-barrel entitlement program. We need to help the program fulfill its original goal of providing funds for projects in areas most at risk.”

The government has spent over $35 billion on DHS grant programs since 2003, and according to Coburn, there is no measure that Americans are safer today than they were before the multibillion dollar expenditures.

Also highlighted in the report is an underwater robot purchased with a $98,000 grant to look for “sunken treasure,” surveillance at the Seattle Mariners and San Diego Padres spring training facilities at a price of $90,000, a Bearcat armored vehicles to protect a small town’s pumpkin festival, $41,000 for a Remote-Control Helicopter in Seattle and $6,200 in sno-cone machine purchases. (RELATED: 2013 zombie swimsuit model calendar)


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  • Militant Conservative

    I have my zombie gun and a few thousnd rounds and live where they film the

    walking dead. Hell, they even warn us NOT to shoot the zombies on the busses

    and MARTA. What a croc o spit.

  • lynno


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    We’re in the middle of the Kenyan-Marxist Apocalypse.


    Many Obama Zombies gather at The White House Press Room everyday.
    Exhibit #289:

  • Redwine

    Of course the regime is funneling taxpayer money into this zombie fraud, just as it’s pouring our hard-earned money into the “climate change,” “green” and “sustainability” schemes, not to mention the truckloads of our cash into reams and reams of oppressive and destructive regulations.
    – Redistribution
    – Reparations (see Pigford)
    – Cronyism

    The time to act is approaching.

  • jorgen

    Why do they attack the zombies? Didn´t they all vote for Obama?

  • mark1973

    While it’s good to see someone protesting DHS expenditures and priorities,it’s not good to see Tom Coburn as the person doing it.

    I don’t believe Coburn’s sincerity for one second. Coburn’s single vote by ‘Unanimous Consent’,pushed Obama’s nightmare,”Food Safety and Modernization Act” through. This is a classic stalinist piece of legislation,that allows Obama’s FADA,to so over-regulate the food industry,that they can literally starve us to death. It allows them to use denial of food as a weapon. It gives the FADA the same power over our food supply that the EPA has over our energy supply. It even regulates home gardens.Coburn’s single vote could have buried it,but instead he chose to pass it.

    Coburn also publicly donated to dem senator Joe Manchin’s campaign instead of his repub opponent. Coburn has also proclaimed his manlove for Obama on ocassion,by saying of Obama, “I love the guy”!

    Coburn has a phony high ACU rating,by voting for Conservative Bills that can’t be passed and voting against liberal Bills that can’t be stopped…All by design! Coburn has no intention of stopping this or any other liberal piece of legislation. He’s using this to try and make us forget,his part in deliberately helping Obama get his agenda through…It ain’t working Tommy. We haven’t Forgot!

  • SturJen

    Here in the Ramirez compound, the “Zombie Apocolypse” is what we call it. It means something entirely different though: When the fighing starts because of something stupid the POTUS does…and that final straw breaks…it’s the Zombie Apocolypse.

    WHen there’s no more $$ for those EBT Cards
    When there’s no more Obamafones
    When the POTUS has ticked off even his own race…
    It will start.

    Zombie to us means those mindless takers who voted in this POTUS…incapable of caring for themselves, incapable of parenting their own children. This is what we’re prepping for. And for the day DHS has deemed people like me a threat to America and tries to come and forefully take me to a ‘re-education camp.’ I ain’t going without a fight.

  • Chris in N.Va.

    Another frickin’ single-synapse brain-fart from the legions of flying-monkey drones under the ersatz leadership of HHS Secretary Genital Incompetano.


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  • If you are ready for zombies, hurricanes are a breeze and blizzards are a gentle snowfall.

  • Eric Mertz

    Guys, this won’t be a popular opinion, but I am glad DHS is encouraging Zombie Plans. Most people I know have vaguely formed Zombie Plans, and more than a few have back-ups or alternates in case something goes wrong or its the wrong kind of zombie. While it may seem stupid at first blush, encouraging people to have Zombie Plans may actually increase the number of preppers out there – which means less people dependent upon the government and more people ready in case of a real emergency – and more people who survive an SHTF or a TEOTWAKI level event.

    As the guy above me said, if you are ready for a Zombie Outbreak, everything else is a walk in the park.

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  • Joanne

    Obama is paying billions to build his own civilian armed forces, but is going to cut the military spending and reduce her arms. Anyone think this isn’t going to be a problem?

  • John T

    Done right, the Zombie Apocalypse scenario is a good teaching tool. I used it to teach younger Boy Scouts about emergency preparedness. Start talking about fires and floods and they lose interest fast. Talk about zombies and they get involved!

    For example, in the event of a Zombie Apocalypse, you’ll want to know where all the exits are, and want to know at least two escape routes from every room in your house. The last thing you want to do is get cornered… Of course this info is helpful if you ever have to deal with a fire too.

    Same with having your “Emergency Pack” ready to go. Most of the same stuff you need if you have to flee your house due to a zombie invasion just happens to be the same stuff you’d need if you had to leave quick due to flash flooding or other disaster.

    We had a lot of fun with it. But then, the government wasn’t paying me thousands of dollars to do it either.

  • Flintstone F.

    I got no problem with the snow cone machines. That’s a purchase that pays instant dividends of tasty fun.

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